Why must guys tell girls who are a little bigger that "they like a girl with meat on her bones?" Yeah needless to say he went home alone
Okay my swimming class is like the fatass/diabetic guide to losing 2 pounds by christmas
That's so unfortunate for him bc you can always find another penis, but he's stuck with it
the head trauma was worth the blowjob.
Ryan learned the all important lesson tonight; Red Bull gives you wings, Jaeger gives you gravity.
We're at the urgent care down the street from you if you care to stop by
isnt this the same guy you hooked up with on his birthday and he then asked, "you were at me birthday?" the next time you were together?
She kept crying and asking why I couldn't look more like Dennis quaid.
He's hitting it raw. Might as well stick his dick in a vat of SARS at this point.
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
We decided it was a good idea to go streaking through the campus. Everything was fine until the sprinklers turned on and we realized the keys were in his pocket.
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
you were peeing in her backyard and some dude came outside and looked at you and was like "thats not a pee spot" and you said "well it is now" then i joined you. Forever poppin squats <3
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
I just got out of a $280 speeding ticket by acting like The Big Lebowski. Seriously Jeff Bridges is the man.
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