Why does it say "go to Planned Parenthood tomorrow" on my dry-erase board?
I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
at the resort hottubing with french twins, who brought champange. this should be a postcard.
I asked her if she wanted to make this a permanent exclusive thing instead of a fuck buddy thing, and she just looked at me like I'm an idiot.
That's because you are an idiot.
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
See what happens chris. I told u not to invite her over. Now shes on her way to jail and were stuck with two pomeranians.
Let's play, "guess how long my Neighbours have been watching me dance naked".
I'm watching sex and the city with my wine and Wendy's. I'm not sure if this is single woman empowerment or not.
I ate you ate to the whole david gray album
I keep jumping up and down in front of the mirror naked. The only motivation I would be to stop and put clothes on is if you come over. Hurry.
I might have snap chatted him. So here's what I need you to do. Find him. Abduct him. Get his phone. View the chat so he can't. Then, buy him ice cream. He deserves ice cream.
sent a snap of my boobs out to my FWB his response was what happened to your other nipple ring.. how do I say it got ripped out by my other FWB last week without sounding like a slut
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
valentines day is a day for loved ones to share. So me and my vibrator. Happy holidays.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
