You're completely useless in the revolution.
you were mad bc i took longer then 2 minutes to finish
Yeah, we spent most of the evening making fun of the drunk girl until we realized it was you.
My 10 year old son gave me a bottle of jameson for fathers day. Did you have something to do with this?
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Oh it's happening. I'm Chugging a beer while sitting next to a 6 year old
To say he's a good fuck is like saying the beatles had a bit of success. My vag is still mourning the fact he moved.
Just remembered when I bought that round of shots I told the girls to "get their whore friend" who was making out with her bf instead of drinking. I don't know why they stayed.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
You had a hot dog outside the bar then made me stop at McDonald's for a double quarter pounder. I'd say you've more than filled your drunken meat quota.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
Can't tell if it's the drugs or science magic, but I *THINK* that mouse just turned into a squirrel.
He corrected my spelling during sexting.
Randomize
