We were tigers and tigers don't wear pants
Yes, that's a picture of my balls. It isn't however an answer to my question.
I just watched a girl in the library pull a vodka bottle out of her bag. I think I'm going to give her my number.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
when you wake up try not to move. we are betting to see if more sprinkles stuck to you or the pong table.
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
i woke up this morning and saw her in my bed and i said to myself, I think I might have a drinking problem.
He always tells me he misses my clit. I feel like I should make a drinking game out of it
Okay I shall begin. Thank you Swedish chef
Hurrfy smmurdshy burrfst!
That is the exact response I was looking for.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
I felt really bad for not letting her go in, it was like we were dangling lesbians in front of her
Who told you that acid and Jurassic World was a good idea?
dont remember, but I'm pretty sure I was convinced that the hybrid dinosaur was satan the whole time. It was actually very spiritual
I apparently asked the bartender for a plastic bag and told her I was gunna puke then grabbed two handles from the bar then put the handles in the plastic bag and left.....
Whose the chick running for dorm president promising bigger dicks and softer toilet paper? That’s who I m voting for
Randomize
