You guys coming?
We are smoking out the bouncer? But after that sure
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
Just found a glow stick inside of my vagina..
With the amount of traffic your vagina gets, it was only a matter of time before someone threw a rave there.
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
I sat on the ground outside wawa chain smoking and telling two strangers about my sex life. I also accepted Rick James Bitch and Celine Dion as their names.
We had 15 min before last call. Exact quote "let's see how drunk we can get."
I have fireworks and redbull; let's make heart attack inducing magic happen.
Hey ER girl, its the EMT you beat at blowjobs shots last night.
That is the scariest sentence I have ever read.
I had to ask. I mean when you get a snap chat of a nipple you have to ask who's it is.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
Just wore the promise ring dad gave me freshman year of high school as a fake wedding band while I bought a pregnancy test. I think it's safe to say that's not what he had in mind with that gift 14 years ago.
We need to get walkie talkies for when we're drunk so if we are at different parties or lost we can talk
Highlight your past hook-ups. You've been stabbed, shot at, run over, and chased down the road...no you can't bring new bar bitch over here!
Dude she has a friend!!!!
It's beautiful. It's what jesusxwants. I should send you a pic of my boobs out of friendship
but next to his bed he has a bible, and on the bible he has a pbr coaster and a condom. how can i stay mad at that? Its amazing.
Randomize
