so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
sitting next to michael phelps in the airport. wonder if he's carrying...
I guess we had a small kitchen fire somehow when we decided to bake fruitroll ups and croutons...
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Is it possible to make a milkshake in a martini shaker or am I gonna need a blender?
So at what point do I tell her that I like fucking these hot southern girls more than I like my relationship with her?
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
It's like hey here is one penis enjoy nothing but that for the rest of your life
By talk him into it I assume you mean blow him into it.
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I feel like I don't even know what's gonna happen when we first see each other. It'll be like explosions and glitter and a unicorn will run by pulling a sleigh of alcohol and sex.
Dear in laws. I am not spending any holidays with you. I dislike your company. A lot.
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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