Teenaged girls are God's best work and the Devil's best tool. Remember that my friend.
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
when i went to the store to buy my pregnancy test they were giving carnations to all the moms and they gave me one and said "just in case"
You're the third person who's asked me for an afternoon blow connection in one day. Unreal.
That's more of a you-issue than a me-issue
We were basically fucking on the dance floor. People kept buying us drinks. It really only encouraged us.
Lets both be adults and never talk about last night again.
Happy Birhtday!
Dad, it's 3am and it's not my birthday... wherever you are, go home
She's high and running across rooftops. Yes we're going to end up in A&E again.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Hey, um, after thinking about it, I decided I really don't want to use applying olive oil to your ass for your fissure as part of foreplay because... well... really? Just read that again.
She was blowing air into green onions and tying knots in them to make "balloons"
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
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