honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
The only reason anyone found out he threw up is because everyone heard it sizzle the bonfire out.
Considering the fact that you wouldn't give me my cat last night because he was "destined for broadway", yeah, I'm accusing you of stealing him
Please tell me this is my four loko that I just woke up in....
I had to jump out of her car while it was moving enough said
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
Please tell me I didn't try to make out with a 70 year old Romanian man last night ...
I'm sitting on the toilet eating a Chick-Fil-A breakfast sandwich. How's your Monday?
When we pulled over so you could pee, you made us stand over you and "make a roof"
I can't wash the smell of tacos off my hands. I feel like the Lady Macbeth of Chipotle.
Pretty sure my parents just hear me get off from the living room but I feel like they should be proud that I did it without a man honestly.
I did a line of coke with my ex tonight. Talk about memories
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
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