it was like she wanted to be a once a week night stand
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
So I'm at planned parenthood and there are 5 people here from Friday's party.
Okay, thats embarrasing even by my standards and I've thrown up while wearing a viking hat. just a viking hat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He fell asleep in the strip club and they paid some stripper $20 to sit on his face until he woke up.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
i'm about to tell me dad "sorry staying in isnt an option. i'm fucking a marine tonight."
So I went tanning and I burned my boobs.
They're like sad pomegranates.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You know it's time to do the dishes when you take shots of water out of a sake glass...
And you wonder why you're always one of the guys?
I managed all three standard threesome configurations a female-bodied person can achieve in just under nine years. I want to high-five everyone involved, but I've lost touch with a couple of them
I'm sitting in my car avoiding a customer. Apparently the new year hasn't affected my attitude nor work ethic
Do you really want to know anything about the inner machinations of a furry's mind
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
Just peed on the front lawn of the capital building. Great American.
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