idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
Remember when we did the egg drop from the Dyson building? Her vag is like that, except with a ham, and the ham doesn't make it. I'll be back to the apartment in ten.
I wonder if Barack Obama has ever been this drunk.
The lack of pants and amount of productivity in my life right now is amazing.
Do you how many people I've successfully loaded into a Mazda Miata? Six. Six people. How? Strategically.
Besides the whole peeing blood for a week thing, it was the best sex of my life.
The sorority chicks were the Persian army, and we were their 300 Spartans. Can barely stand up now...such a good ratio
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
Everyone was hooking up and I was just by myself rolling around in the grass at one point ... Which I am allergic to.
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
YOU IS KIND. YOU IS SMART. YOU IS IMPORTANT. YOU IS CLEANING YOUR OWN VOMIT.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
You need to stop leading guys on at bars - you're a lesbian.
And now I'm a lesbian with better self-esteem.
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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