how do you wash the taste of whore out of your mouth?
Im already sauced. Have been for hours. Its kinda my thing.
so i had sex last night with my 12th partner, but hes number 1 for my first time using a condom. i think im finally learning.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I just noticed she took the "toys" too. That's how you know when it's really over.
he told me my vagina was like a beautiful piece of salami
Chicken wings don't come back up an through your nose as easily as you'd think
Hickies on top of my hickies. I need a leash and/or a positive female role model
So the night ended when we tried making fireworks out of gunpowder and oregano. You can figure out how that went.
Its like a match made in avoid-eachother-because-we're-antisocial-and-awkward heaven
Based on my body hair location, my ancestors had very cold hamstrings and very warm chests
There are five fire trucks here and needless to say my booty call left so come back home whenever you like
Like I’ve seen him completely trashed and I’ve also seen him rip shirtsleeves off with his teeth and I can’t tell if I’m intrigued or not
you should come have a drink with me (non alcoholic or otherwise) im at the same bar as your sister and a few guys that would apparently "lick your butthole"-congratulations
i just wanted have a romantic star gaze moment with him. untill he let out a massive fart.
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