508, what difference does it make? You were alone, anyway.
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
oh hey just found a glowstick in my tits. fuck yes new years eve
is it pathetic that I think he's cheating and it doesn't bother me because for the first time I'm the girlfriend and not the other girl?
What are you doing? Did I punch you in the face last night?
I would personally love to see the surveillance video of me throwing my stuff inside, peeing on the sidewalk, then crying hysterically when I realized I locked myself out. Again.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Sitting in back of morning lecture drinking a daqueri from my pink unicorn cup. Pretty sure the girl next to me smells it.
I'm wearing a real bra and real shoes. I look like a fucking lady.
He asked me to hum the Ghost Busters theme song as I was going down on him
I was hooking up with him and then someone banged on the door and shouted "When you get the chance, will you put the weed on the veranda?"
He peed my bed and tried to say it was just the wine. The red wine. On white sheets. He's not a good liar.
I was a plus one at an intervention for a person I didn't know.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
There are footprints all over my windshield
You said you were making waffles...
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