Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
Facebook is used to stalk your friends, Twitter is used to stalk celebritie=s, and Myspace is used to stalk underaged girls. Everything else is porn. T=he Internet in a nutshell.
just saw a girl come out of the tanning bed room on crutches, now thats determination
idk how it happened. she made a very smooth transition from crying to blowing me
Ive been tazing him too get him immuned. He will be unstopable.
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
Apparently my gaydar only works on americans. Frenchie capris has two topless chicks in our kitchen making him breakfast.
The security guard told you that the room was off limits and you just looked at him and said,"Its okay, I have a beard".
She left me naked in my bed and without my phone I had her give me her phone number on the calculator on my laptop. It might be fake.
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
Aka I'm headed to the liquor store because I don't know how to handle my emotions.
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
You rolled over grabbed my crotch and said "that's my waffle." I'm sleeping on the couch next time.
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