But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
dude. I'm so drunk.
pete, this is bryce's mom
I can't wait to have my cock in your ass
pete, this is still bryce's mom
we were watching porn and trying to copy the position they were doing now i think my hip is dislocated
why didn't you tell me his penis tasted like oreos?
It's official. Hawaii is 100% better when you're stoned.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
don't say the first was when I crawled under into the dressing room
He's telling everyone that the only reason he's at this party is to hook up with me. SOS HELP.
I wish on days I started my period Chipotle would come to my house with a burrito bar ... Then give me a chocolate cake and a large beer.
This is a sacred holiday in the land of the free! I do what I want!
things I never thought I would say vol. 24 "Bagpipes just remind me that my relationship is over"
I totally almost forgot you fucked that guy. St. Patty's bar crawls always have a drawback.
The alcohol tastes like we did a beer run at the nail salon
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Why can't all sociopaths be as fabulous as me?
soo... how was my night?
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