return my video game
id be glad to
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
She eyed me up from across the bar and mouthed "I have no gag reflex".
I kept grabbing at Stephanie's boobs because I thought the leopard spots on her dress were popcorn.
Oh no, we smoked the revival weed. It came in a Batman bag. It hit like justice. And orphans.
THEY NOW HAVE MIXED DRINK EMOJIS! LIFE IS GOOD! PRINCESSES DON'T DRINK BEER
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Never should have deleted her from my facebook. My new girl is so much hotter than she is, I just want to passive aggressively rub it in her face
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
You can tell by the way he cuddles that he's got mommy issues
I'm fucking my way through California and it's kind of fun.
I just mixed tangerine juice with sauv blanc. on an unrelated note, my episide of intervention is slated to run in April.
You know you drink too much when the bartender at your favorite bar recognizes you at chipotle with your sunglasses on.
I got conspiracy theory drunk.
Randomize
