there are some really hot girls on the bus. i want to lips them
So I said to her: one time i broke my dick and when they took off the cast i could cum across a baseball field
that girl last night was a 15
wait she was 15?
no like black jack not sure if you should hit it
I wish my new phone didn't autocorrect so well. People will never experience the magic of my drunk texts because they think I'm making a coherent statement.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
My only objective is to get drunk enough to forget the last 364 days.
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
If I come back tomorrow to find a certain football player tied up and locked in your closet, shit's gonna get real.
I'll set him free tomorrow morning ;)
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOW DO I ALWAS FIND THEM?! THERE WAS BE A SOCIETY OF SMALL PENISED MEN AND I MUST BELONG TO IT!
Nothing says casual like stairwell bjs
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
im buying my prof a giftcard to the state store bc he talked ab crying into a glass of tequila so he deserves it
Sorry for trying to baptize you last night
You knew the entire thing in Latin I was so impressed
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