If you could channel this insane talent for stalking you'd be a great weapon for this country. If you had a crush on Bin Ladin, guaranteed he'd be found, monitered and tagged within five days.
He was doing push ups, crunches and jogging in place in front of the restaurant. I'm not too sure I want to eat there if it requires immediate exercise following the meal.
i grabbed his hand and told him i loved him and then he looked down and said "i love...mallomars" and shoved like three in his mouth. never been so embarrassed.
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
just woke up face down in my kitchen covered in cheetos. my mom just stepped over me to get to the coffee maker. hello summer
if he only knew that in between each sext i was puking.
He came up there while i was bartending, ate a salad, told me he wanted to divorce me, then tipped me 10 dollars....
Hes stumbling drunkenly around the streets of New York with a balloon vagina on his head. I'd say hes having a good night.
People are yelling about how much they want you here.
I'm going to change, vomit up my mexican food to save the trouble later, and then come meet you. Thrilled.
Stalker pic that shit
He left, I think he got uncomfortable when I started singing 'oompah oompah doodley do, I have a special riddle for you'
I literally woke up walked into the bathroom, threw up and died this morning. Then went to my 8am.
Go have a frustration cry and get over it
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
Randomize