And now I'm afraid that I'm a pornographic eater.
I tried watching the view, i got through 8 minutes. That is probably a world record.
They always sound like a bunch of chickens.
There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
Reason #1 for no sex outdoors: Mosquito bites. Awkward, awkward mosquito bites.
I really hope our interview with channel 6 last night doesn't air or else my parents are gona get a first hand look at my alcohol problem
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Which is worse rug burn on your nipples or laying there after wondering how long you have to cuddle before you can sneak away?
he was spitting whole peanuts projectile out of his mouth at the waitresses as they walked by and then yelled across the restaurant that he had "no problem kicking any of their asses"
there is no excuse for drinking mascato in your room alone while listening to one-hit wonders from the 90s
And now for everyone's least favorite sport... Drunk babysitting.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Oh no that was the time I did the walk of shame with no shoes
You can't just drop that I might be walking into a foursome and leave it at that
Randomize
