Is it bad that when I see ugly people make out, I hope he's impotent?
Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
You hooked up with 4 random girls, avoided your grilfriend finding out about it, and dodged traffic on Park Ave. Can you say luck of the Irish?
Dude..masurbate with cocoa butter lotion..its like cocoa pebbles just gave me a hand job
I wont be hard to find. Im wearing a darth vader mask and I have a megaphone.
Did you pluck my eyebrows one night when I passed out?
She was trying to fuck the exchange student from France. His English is really bad and the music was loud so she just pointed to a beer bottle and then her vagina.
Just beat off to internet porn while talking to my mom on the phone and eating a cinnamon roll. U have 5 minutes to get on my level
I was basically shocked at how calmly you accepted my violently shoving a french fry in your mouth.
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
You ran outside of the party to do the rain dance and swim in puddles
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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