her vagine was all disorganized.
Just threw up at the table during our Father's Day dinner. And I managed to get quite a bit on dad, so that was nice.
I can't belive they dont sell booze Sunday mornings. I mean some of us have to work
just got my tax refund and at bell. how do you say i want a grand worth of 5 layer burritos in spanish?
At my internship. I get drug tested tmr at 2
Are they going to pay you for the one day you worked?
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
IM A SHIT SUOW THE GUYS AT THE PMACR TOLD ME AJDBO I WEBF RO WALNARY WITH OU SHOES! I WASHT LLOWES FLOWERSA
My walk of shame was 2 miles of feathers flying off of me, underwear in hand, and a homeless man telling me he'd pray for me. It was gold medal worthy.
I think we need to have a day of drinking in classes. I know we don't share any, but sacrifices need to be made.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
It's the 30 sec rule.... the worst that could happen is I could die
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
And don't worry, I have a great track record of rallying after a casual midday blackout.
He was so wasted he lit his sink on fire with shit he found in his room....it was smokeless. Chemistry majors drunk = the coolest shit ever.
He's finally divorcing her, so naturally he tells me that we're not exclusive anymore. His penis 'wants what it wants' apparently.
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