He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
The douche that always wears spandex at the gym just walked into class with a dick going into his mouth drawn on his face. The professor said "rough night" and he still has no idea. Tyring to get a pic
Min and u sung xhionubjs. Cause that's what u kiij like a xhionunk
if i got ashes i think they'd burn a hole into my head with the amount of sins i've committed this year alone and it's only february
She's like my safety school. At the end of the night, if I haven't found anyone better to hook up with, I can always call her if I need a place to drop a load and don't want to rub one out myself. Perfect next door neighbor.
Look, when i woke up this morning, I had every intention of being a responsible twenty-five year old, cleaning up, making my budget, and filing my taxes. Its just I got siderailed by pot and downloading classic Disney songs, because fuck adulthood; everyone loves Disney.
STOP TRYING TO FUCK MY DAD
THE HOT GUY IS YOUR DAD?!?!?!?!???
Which one of you fucks put a bounty out on my brother's virginity?
I don't work there anymore. If they had Prince themed dildo parties i never would have quit
Your dad was just slow dancing with the priest and holding a beer. Classic
Turns out that fresh outta jail dick is quite something.
When he identified himself as captain clitoris i knew my night was fucked.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
Randomize
