You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
you definitely held a convo with a hobo
we have a secret handshake
Remember how we wr so drunk last nite we cldnt find whr i shot my load? ...found some of it.
Blew in her face. She is Pissed. Yahtzee. As she brushes her teeth.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
1. I feel like Jello 2. The girl i hooked up with last night isn't here and a different girl is lying next to me. 3. I have no clothes on 4. Can guys go on walks of shame?
I ate goldfish off your shoulder, I think we had bigger issues
So it's national ass day?! I love October. No bra last Saturday and now ass day. This is my month. God is dedicating this October to me!
New rule for Thursdays: no high gymnastics
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
Never thought going to McDonald's alone at 3 AM would end with a blowjob outside some random girl's apartment...
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
Somehow, you looked so classy chugging that bottle of wine last night.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE AWKWARD SEXUAL EXPERIENCES WITH HIM.
don't worry, i'll dog sit again, the barking made the sex better, its like he was cheering for us, we were just THAT good.
Randomize
