You know you love balls. Don't act all "I-Don't-Love-Balls-ish"
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
He's trying to wipe up all the spilled drinks with a banana
Definitely just saw a grown man at wal mart wearing high heels and carrying a baby
What the fuck were you doing at wal mart?
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What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
He would stand there for a few seconds with a blank look on his face then randomly start running full sprint towards macdonalds. We'd catch him and he'd promise to stop so we'd let him go and he'd do it again.
Bad news is I found gravy in my nightstand again.
Hne relally is a cite oerfect gome. Nes awddddddddooooome.
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
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He offered to take my unemployed self out for drinks, but I really just want him to buy me the Beyoncé album
I think I just figured out how to make weed tea in the coffeemaker.
My body looks like ricotta cheese had a vacation
After he finished he laid there and told me how much work that just was. I looked at him and told him not to ruin a good thing by opening his mouth.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I see more hoeing in ur future
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