Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
Then you jumped off your bed with your arms outstretched, yelled "I'm Goliath, watch out New York!" and then began singing the Gargoyles theme song as you 'soared' around your room.
Don't be ridiculous, the Gargoyles theme song has no words. How could I sing that mess?
You just started going "da da da da da! da da da da da! DA DA!!" then going "swoosh" as you glided about.
we've been at disney 20 seconds and she already got the cops called over
I asked about his 3 inch scar on his chest. It's from when he had to castrate a bull on the estancia. Apparently this is how good bull meat is made.
I just saw someone marching around outside wearing only a loincloth, dragging a fuckton of sheet metal. Spring has Sprung.
it wasn't the penis i had been hoping for.....but i took it regardless.
His appology was" look at it this way, at least you'll give better head without those teeth.'
I'm covered in egg mcmuffin wrappers and my room smells like dead hooker.
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I CAN FEEL MY HEART BEATING MY WHOLE BODY
I used my iced coffee to ice the bump on my head from last night
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
I'm like, not good at living.
wait. i have to tell u something. and it has nothing to do with dildos or spiders
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