You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
what i wouldnt give for a night at orourkes without seeing 3+people ive slept with
i just lost my virginity over my 3 hour lunch break..
u hav a 3 hour lunch break?!
i like how the length of my lunch break is the thing that phases u
Nothing like throwing up 1/2 price appatizers and 2 4 1 personal pitcher in uniform to remind myself what a succesful failure I am
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I respect you for how well you shave your vagina. It isn't easy and my dick faces out, not in.
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
This is God's way of telling me He loves me and wants me to be a cocktease.
Go forth my daughter and give blue balls to all who may gaze upon your tits.
No we just stood in the kitchen and laughed for 2 hours about how funny the popcorn noise was.
It's just not a Friday night unless I'm getting propositioned by a guy in a wheelchair via Facebook messenger...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just successfully invited my mom to a drag show. If that doesnt say "im gay" then idk what will.
He will be forever remembered as "birthday failure" ...Got him to pierce his tongue in my bathroom, but not sleep with me......
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I apologize for using the phrase "monster cock hentai porn shit" to describe that guy I picked up last week.
I ain't lettin her quit anyway. We don't fuck enough for her to meet the housewife requirements
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
Randomize