You wanna call me after your homoerotic shower?
i woke up, turned over, and noticed an assortment of knives stuck in my wall. i should prob stop drinking
My boobs are too big for things to be going this downhill in my life.
there are seriously like six guinea pigs in my bathtub right now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i don't know. but im upstairs in the closet with a burger i found in their fridge
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
Well, let's see..I held him while he cried for 30-40 minutes, woke up on his couch AND he gave me a ride home in his underwear. Shit show is not even the half of it.
i dont remember how or why, but i now have 3 coupons for a free BJ from Anise stapled to my right arm.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it's the amount of time you spend on preventing me from puking that really cements this friendship
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I'm about to have a threesome at the hotel where I had my quinceañera. Becoming a woman under this roof for the second time, whaaat
At leat we can cross off 'having sex in a classroom' on our bucket list.
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
I used to want you to marry him...Now I just think you deserve a bigger penis than that.
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