At what point are you a chubby chaser or just desperate for sex?
Hold my feet while i lean out of the window of the truck.
2011 senior yearbook drinking game. we're taking a shot whenever some dumbass uses that quote about how life isn't isn't about the breaths you take, but the moments that take your breath away. also that retarded wayne gretzky one about missing shots you don't take.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
The moment you ate chicken nuggets out of your purse you were my hero.
Where the hell did i get chicken nuggets from
you stumbled up the stairs in your heels, pulled 23 one-dollar bills out of your bra and then went and puked in the toilet. didnt say a single thing to me the whole time
My neighbor Chris is here. I am warning you, he is wearing a kilt I just saw his balls. Be incredibly careful that you don't see what I did.
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
I have a strict rule of what enters my vajay. It's either sparkly, or human. Anything else and I draw the line. Standards.
Not to mention I think lunch is a little inappropriate when our relationship is only based on Mario kart and alcohol so far...
Are we at that point yet where I can just say "I want you to sit on my face"? If not, want to go out for "drinks"?
I think that's the first time I had "ass rimming" scroll across my phone at work
Is it fucked up to venmo someone for plan-b?
maybe i should limp back to therapy...
oh yeah will you also bring home vodka i wanna do shots on the roof
I should probably apologize for licking you last night since you drove me home, but I stand by my decision
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