wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
I should just throw a hundred dollar bill into the wind and walk away... save myself the hangover.
I decided to name her "day after thanksgiving" because I am sure I just got someone elses leftovers.
I replied to the university automated mass text about the armed robbery at the on-campus Starbucks with a sad face. Basically sums up my night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We had sex on a ferris wheel in canada, our relationship will never be the same
Hold on there are flying pancakes I can't handle this right now
I told my dad that bagels were the equilelent of angels kisses and if he bought me one i would do a split
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
I think I just snorted head and shoulders by mistake.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I need a burrito and a hug.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
Enough talk of my burning loins. How is your day?
Good news y'all just straight up snorted 2 adderall and I'm not a real being on this plane of existence anymore and I'm ready for finals
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize