How fat would you say she has to be before I can consider this a threesome
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
I just wanted to let you know I just licked gravy off of my boobs. Just putting that out there.
I need a horse. I don't think you can get a DUI on a living creature.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
There is a limo involved. Man up, and make yourself puke. Its only one more night of blacking out.
Ahhh sometimes you just need a thermos of whiskey in the library
It's basically the same plan, only step one gets revised to "look hot enough that he forgets I fucked his roommate"
Seriously I'm dying. All my insides are fighting their way out of me. With light sabers and machetes.
ok, i suppose pissing your pants could be considered a wardrobe malfunction.
get your sex hands out of my capn crunch
Here's an unsolicited pic of my tits, because you almost died last night.
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
I'm pretty sure that waking up butt ass naked with a bottle of 151 and a note that said "I didn't want to wake you up, but thanks" proves I had a good time....god bless America
Randomize
