at a bar and heard one girl tell another her tampon string was showing she goes i dont want it in anymore anyways. then proceeds to pull out her tampon in the middle of the bar and leave it on a plate. ewwww
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
she just took adderol and chased it w dog water
She told me she eats fruit when she's hungover because it has more water than water.
He kept coming back from the bar with hotter girls and just left with two...I feel like I just witnessed something amaZing. Like meeting Jesus and finding out he has no morals either
At this point the smell of shame has become my natural musk
That was the apt with beer in the juice and the floor caving in. Don't go.
I feel like a monkey keeps fucking me in the ear with a trombone as a dick.
Just saw a midget on an elliptical. Epic.
I told you, she may have multiple personality disorder, but like in the most upbeat way possible.
Will you be super villain lesbian lovers with me for halloween?
He told me that he wants to fuck me only wearing a princess tiara...How could I possibly say no to that?
That guy u hooked me up with kept calling me james while were doing it...
I woke up in a bathtub full of green and blue Nickelodeon slime! wtf?!
Randomize
