Lets evaluate? U kissed one boss and lef twith another man. I cock teased the other, hardcore had a tongue jammed down my throat, made out w aa third then left in a cab w alex w them all yelling at me and offering rides. My cheek was also licked and bitten by 2 other men and we almost made out (u and me) because they asked. were hired.
After work we went home to fool around. Turns out he had sawdust under his foreskin. I'm never going down on him again.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
just masturbated through my pocket at the library. hope you're enjoying your saturday night out.
to which he commented "you must really like me on top". I didn't have the heart to tell him that was the only way the room stopped spinning
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
he spent like 10 minutes trying to convince us that he was throwing up in the bushes on purpose in order to cut weight for wrestling
You missed me roundhouse kicking a lit glow stick out of a guy's mouth last night. You would have been proud.
you invented a new sport called "bacon pulling" and you cried everytime a piece broke
Yes. No, I'm basically a superhero but with drugs. I'm robin hood. I steal from the rich (insurance and drug companies) and give to the poor (everyone I know).
going on a mission to find my pants and the guy who stole my beer don't wait up
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
When dealing with embarassing medical issues, don't you want your brother's wife to be the one fishing around up your ass?
Like I blink, and he's face first in my vagina.
he had DANDRUFF in his PUBES. 0/10 would not blow again.
Randomize
