Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
i think my mom watched the whole time
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
people should stop making movies, we'll never top bio-dome.
Theres a dude at this concert at the urinal double fisting beers, taking drinks from both while simultaneously pissing euerywhere. He is my hero
amateur piercings on our way to the beach? check.
Whoever put the tambourine in the dryer is a douche. Worst hangover wakeup ever
I woke up in a place I've never been before, with people I've never met before using me as a table for domino's.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
There was another blizzard last night and at one point I was drinking 3 beers at once. Driving home didn't seem like a wise option
I'm still pretty stoned. There are mini rice cakes in my robe pocket to snack on in the shower.
OUR DIABOLICAL SLUT PLAN HATH COMMENCED!
All I need to do is acquire a Shrek costume.
Please don't traumatize your girlfriend too terribly. Have fun.
I thought accidentally shaving off my fingertip while trying to shave my butthole was going to be the most unexpected part of my day, but no
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
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