My hand turned me down
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i take joy in having bigger boobs than others
I answered the my mom's phone call about what we're doing for father's day while he was still fucking me. She thought I seemed really excited about his hiking boots present.
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
I like to think of them as justice herpes. She cheats on me and gets more than she bargained for.
Were gonna hotbox in the trunk. I think there's room for another half of a person if you're interested
Her name means "flower that enlarges and gives birth." There is no way she isn't getting knocked up
Decided to make myself tequila gummy bears but got impatient and just drank the bowl of tequila.
These last 48 hours have just been about deleting my most recent snap story
LETS THROW SHIT OFF THE PORCH
Rolled over in bed this morning and found Nutella and wet naps. Why can't it ever be a fire fighter, or Jude Law.
we should get together and get drunk.
On a Monday?
don't discriminate against mondays.
The blunt fell in the hottub, i mean i knew she was upset but i didnt expect her to dive for it and come up balling her eyes out...
Hot fire fighters installing my closet. Don't know how to go about this. Gonna nonchalantly take my shirt off and see what happens..
Randomize
