Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(816): View more from Missouri

He's paying me $45 to clean his room and $55 if i find the oxy that he lost.

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(410): View more from Maryland

i wanna give whoever invented massage chairs a blow job.

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(419): View more from Ohio

i woke up to him dangling his cock in front of my face

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(856): View more from New Jersey

2 classes, 3 finals, and $30 worth of adderall until this semester is over.

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23 Strangest Things That Gave Dudes A Boner
Read it at the TFLN blog
(701): View more from North Dakota

I didn't realize I was holding it, until I was like, "whose baby is this?"

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(757): View more from Virginia

i decided what we are doing for your 21st b-day: camelbacks filled with margaritas

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(702): View more from Nevada

Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision

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(407): View more from Florida

Stumbled across a pregnancy test in my closet. Oh, the freshman year flashbacks..

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(907): View more from Alaska

At least life still wants to fuck me.

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