Have u ever been so drunk that pissing urself felt like a better idea than walking to the bathroom? I entered those waters last night
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
I took a picture of his ID so i could remember how to spell his last name and facebook stalk him later...I think he saw me do it
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Don't be a smartass. I'm trying to fuck a guy who's sober. It's more difficult than you think.
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Your roommates boyfriend just approached me while I was working to tell me about the staph infection he got on his face. Where do you find these people?
We team puked and then made sex like wild monkeys. If that isn't love, I don't know what is.
I've started a list of places i want to drink. To go along with the list of places i want to have sex. Lincoln's log cabin is on both.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I made out with a mom and her daughter and got a black eye, so yeah, my birthday went well
I know this is a weird question but we both had pants on when my mom woke us up last night right?
You tried paying your tab with the coaster
Our relationship is perfect
90% threatening to punch him in the dick 10% actual dickpunching
Him showing up yesterday was like a giant ego stroke for my vagina.
if it makes you feel any better you looked really comfortable while you were sleepin in the closet, atleast according to the pictures i woke up with on my phone
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