Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
ur dog is so gonna tell on us one day.
for doing what?
for smoking bowls out on the deck while your parents aren't home.
If the pens lose tonight I'm gonna drive to Detroit and burn 8 mile to the ground.
Actually I may do that regardless. Probably get my own holiday.
When we were fucking i started barking and growling at her.. you shoulda seen her face
i sold my breathalizer so i could buy weed
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
After the VIP Latina experience at the strip club last night, I am rooting for Mexico in this years World Cup.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
You Were screaming "Im trying to get it in" and "stop cock blocking" while i threw you in the car
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
He's drinking on a hospital bracelet, the fuck's your excuse?
My parents are paying for my knee surgery for my birthday. What costume will look good on crutches for my Halloween Birthday?
Welcome to adulthood.
Btw...refried beans is a terrible thing to throw up.
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Randomize
