What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
You give one guy a hand job and suddenly everyone wants to get with you
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
we have to get out to the bar earlier. all of the guys are already committed to the girls they're going home with.
I am now the only person in my apartment who hasn't had sex in my bed.
she got kicked out of the bar for shoving german chocolate cake in the bartenders face. we were there less than a minute
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
Please tell me I didn't help an old woman shave her vagina last night. Please.
That's the least of the fucked up shit you did last night dude.
I guess she fell asleep at the strip club and the other one was crying because she had a vagina in her face. Happy 21st!
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
i just realized I haven't been laid all summer. So sad. What a waste of a perfectly good vagina.
Bill says he deeply regrets the incident with the soda bottle
Mike's letting gay guys do body shots off him again.
My boyfriend, ladies and gentlemen.
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score one for mom.
Randomize
