he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
You feel like going out tonight?
Does a 14yr-old girl look good beat up? I'll bring the handle
Oh shit, I think we need to get you a hobby that doesn't include penises
I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is pulling weed out of a vagina a good thing or a bad thing?
she wants me to meet her parents and she hasn't even met my penis yet.
I'm currently witnessing my drunk neighbor attempting to fold laundry on his front lawn. I think he's trying to spell out HELP.
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yeah Greg found him eating out of a tuna can with a pill cap
No dude I got way too drunk to function. 90% sure I tried to FaceTime 911.
Try explaining "the nature of your relationship" to a cop when your fuck buddy vandalized your car. Priceless.
Doing laundry. My jeans from last night smell like chicken wings and motor oil.
dont know how to tell my grandparents I woke up in a frat house in the wrong town and that's why I can't see them today
Its 6:30pm and dad just drunk called me asking me what the alarm code at home is..... I'm at home, and dad isn't here.....
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