haha i think we're both just down to be fuck buddies..but i do have a hickey and a bit of a big lip and fucking burns on my knees..note to self hooking up on a golf course is NOT that exciting
this morning i woke up with my panties on and i knew where i was. success.
Apparently Chef Boyardee is the only guy I'm taking home tonight.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
Don't worry. I has chaperone.
I'm crawling around naked in my room looking for my hairbrush. Just thought I'd put that image in your head.
Is there a reason why the cops knew her name as they were chasing her?
For the record it's 1026 and you told me I could leave you in the bathroom.
I'm on a no morals kick. That'll be 3 girls in 24 hours....ending 2011 with a bang
If you're receiving this text it's probably because I drunkenly flashed you on Saturday. Sorry for forcing you to look at my tits. That was uncalled for.
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
Okay. How did someone manage to piss on TOP of a urinal? What giant is roaming around with a prick five feet from the ground?
Did we do anything stupid last night besides hook up with our ex girlfriends?
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
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