i said send nudes i get bra and panties. thats not what i fucking asked for.
Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
we're taking a shot everytime we receive a "Happy Thanksgiving!!!!!" mass text. up to 7 since 10am. God help us.
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
These 19 Men’s Fashion Mistakes are Unforgivable, According to Women
at the bar. watching boys pee in urinals. when they come out we give them a thumbs up or a thumbs down. probbb shouldn't prop the bathroom door open with a bar stool....
i just threw up a quarter into the urinal in the bathroom at the bar. everybody else stared then cheered. that drunk
she works at a police station now. i think thats the definition of keeping your enemies closer.
I dont care about anyone or anything else I just want to make love to you on my air mattress
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
25 Cringeworthy Below the Pants Injuries
Alright, I can go by eventually,, I don't wanna lose a second pair of shoes this semster from blacking out...
Only thing worse than going to work with a hangover is going to work with a hangover then realizing that u don't have to work that day
I forgot to tell you, wear something you can puke on Saturday. We're christening this marriage with a shot of jager. NOT KIDDING.
I'd rather be castrated by angry chipmunks Than live your life for 24 hours
If i still have my costume on when i get home from the bar i am gonna be pissed
I ended up sleeping on a park bench. Never using Tinder again.