Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
When I saw him standing at full height, I realized exactly how much his body structure reminds me of his penis.
doing shots has become such a natural thing to me that i just instinctively swallowed listerine
I started the year with 2,800 dollars and am now down to 83 dollars-one of which i use to snort my focalin. I have given up on food and am perplexed as to how I can make 82 dollars last more than two weekends for booze
You are the sheppard guiding my vagina away from horrible decisions.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Why can't it ever be the normal ones that stalk me?
The cops walked in and cracked up bec he was passed out on the couch in a pink tutu.
This guy smells like mr Rogers puppets and I don't know how to deal with it
I finally fell asleep and like an hour later he wakes me up and says "I've always to be woken up w a blowjob." Um, that's not how it works asshole.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
Pretty sure the delivery guy saw me taking a shit this morning
You are currently doing Harry Potter spells with the turkey-baster...
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
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