I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
He came on my face and tried to draw out a smiley face because he said I looked like I had a bad day
This is random, but did i give u a handjob in the middle of the night or was that a dream?
So High I just made Cadbury Coffee. I don't know what it is yet, but it involves Cadbury Eggs and coffee.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
definitely fulfilled the lesbian status quo and fucked her in the back seat of my prius
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
How did you make it to work sans hangover?
4 words: Clif Bar soaked in tequila. Just like albert pujols
I knew when her mom came in spraying me with Febreeze telling me I smelled like shame it was going to be a rough day.
THEY AREN'T MARRIED. PUT ON YOUR HOMEWRECKING PANTIES AND GET TO WORK. NO EXCUSES.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I have a pair of clean panties in my purse. This is having your life together.
i spent 45 minutes yellng Heather I feel so bad i wanna die and then 45 more yelling I DONT WANNT TO DIE. thats how drunk i was
i just want a position where we can lock up like some sort of sexual megatron and go the whole night that way
Hey, it's all about finding the bright side. And boobs are definitely a bright side.
Do you find Darth Vader masks attractive?
She then told me, and I quote "I want to send you nudes just to see how you'd react."
Randomize