Skip Greektown and come to Geektown. I just want to cuddle.
It's Friday. Sex?
It must have been true love
I don't call true love eating a bag of doritos and then going down on each other
That bar we were at last night smelled like cougars. Virginia Slims, Aqua Net and Summer's Eve.
Do you think when graham bell invented the phone he ever thought that people would be using them to facebook on the shitter?
nutella sex= disaster
Burger king has cupcake flavored milkshakes. God dammit America.
He passed out on the floor and you kept hitting him in the dick and screaming "hammer of justice".
I think I found an E pill under the couch.. Or really bad tasting candy. Check back in 30min this could get exciting
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Is putting "Tonight I'm Fucking You" on my date playlist too forward?
I may or may not have pissed on my floor last night
Welcome to 22
Im so glad I make morally wrong decisions. It's like the best worst thing I've ever done.
Good friends go out of their way to crop dust your ex not once but twice. I knew we were friends for a reason
I'm always down for nudity.
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