is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Apparently last night I sat at the bar with an upside down sharpie lightning bolt on my forehead, yelling "It's Harry Potter's birthday! Let me be on the qudditch team!" And I kept calling the bartender Dobby. There are videos.
She looks like Sash Grey but sounds like Fran Drescher. Advise.
it wasn't sex, it was awkward naked time.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
well i mean, we just followed them into an alien and astronaut party. there was tin foil everywhere
Found some boxer briefs on my patio table this morning surrounded by a case worth of empties. Starting to remember why I have rugburn and a sore asshole.
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
There are regrets.. and there are RAGRETS
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
I LACK THE NECESSARY BRAIN FUNCTIONS TO BE ABLE TO PROPERLY RESPOND TO THAT
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
The fact that u had sex with a Disney prince blows my mind, you're my hero.
Well, I was arguably the most sober adult in the house by 1 in the afternoon, so I'd say Superbowl Shitshow was a success.
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