Best look from Detroit today: running across the street with your buttcheeks on display carrying a 40 oz. Or maybe being crazy-pregnant and screaming and slamming a pay phone. Toss up.
Either way I should probably pregame on the plane
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Noooo. We thought it would be funny for him to wake up buried in the sand. But we just remembered about the whole high tide thing and it's dark and it's pretty damn hard to find an unconscious head sticking out of the sand. Just help us out
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
I think I threw my underwear away at What-A-Burger last night.
Seriously you have a sixth sense. You woke up out of a nap to tell us all to check the clock and it was 4:18. You're like the spiderman of smoking weed.
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
I'm like still hungover from the quinceanera.
i still can't believe he got laid by going to the bar and handing out "cuddle buddy" application forms
The fact that I am laying in bed on my stomach with an ice pack on my rump is a clear indication that I am no longer in my carefree 20s
Let's play the game let's see how long Kayla can be sober
So how do I get back in good graces for trying to trade you for superbowl tickets?
I'm trying to drink up the confidence to run in public.
He woke me with blue berry pancakes and a blow job. He's a keeper.
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