we should wear snuggies to the strip club
Its a three day weekend with Valentines day thrown in... Im obligated to get drunk
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
Just looked at my outgoing calls. Seems I had a 7 minute convo with my 10th grade english teacher at 2:56 am Saturday...
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
You can't just hum the Jaws theme song when you pull down my pants.
We made a trail of cheez balls so we knew how to get back to te apartment.
When she was dating that guy she told me If they broke up, I would receive a call and no matter what I was doing I'd have to go over a fuck her. It's like being an EMT for sex.
they paper machayed me.
i told you ... never pass out drinking with preschool teachers.
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
Just so you know, your wedding is in the same place I gave my first bj.
Less than a month to graduation and I'm still blacking out on the reg tonguing down the closest breathing organism preferably with a penis but I'm flexible, and still havent figured out how to be functional on Fridays. WHY don't they teach us valuable shit at this institution!?
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
He had me sit on his face until I begged him to stop, then held me there 5 minutes longer. I rested my head on his chest, told him I needed time to recover....and slept for 6 hours. By the time I woke, he was already at work. I just sent him a countdown times until his shift is over.
Yeah. I got a Tetnus shot then partied like it was 1999.
Randomize
