A guy on the street just growled at me and said damnnnn. Sometimes it scares me how attractive i am.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
Also, last night I had a dream that I was in a victoria's secret fashion show and they made me wear a t-shirt over my lingerie. Spring dieting begins now.
I think i just fucked the same guy a second time without realizing it....does that make me a good whore or a bad whore???
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I have a friend that keeps saying he wants to go bear hunting. Thought I would say just walk down church street at night. What intersection is it?
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Other than my penis smelling like an ashtray, it went really well.
I know it was your bday but bringing a airhorn and blowing it yelling "buy me a fucking shot" in the bartenders face was a little uncalled for
Today is a spill-drugs-all-over-myself kind of day.
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
Woke up this morning with a darth vader helmet and a bath robe on with my toenails shitly painted
I agree and I would be an awesome dog
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
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