Woke up this morning to a janitor hitting me in the head with his bucket in the hallway of my building. An alumni was next to me because we locked ourselves out of my room and couldn't figure out where my roommates were.
Exactly how deep of a burn should you have when you pee before becoming legitimately concerned?
dude they were twins that means they were both only 17
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
he said that he wanted to outsmoke the rain, I don't know what that means but I'm gonna go help him
If him repeating sorry while thrusting isn't makeup sex than I don't know what else is
Semen is not good for contacts.
id say bad/good trip...at first I wanted to claw off my skin... but then when i tried i ended up tickling myself for an hour.
COME GET ME FR THE HOSPIGAL'!!!!!
We are no longer allowed to have pre 4th party week. I woke up with a donut stuck to my face and 'MILF' written in black marker on my stomach.
Mother of the Year
Almost to my house to grab beer. And pants.
She posted a pic of her bf on ig wishing him a happy bday at midnight. She then proceeded to have sex with me. Who is the bday boy again?
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
I don't want my vagina anymore.
I want to find him again. His Corona tank top and I were made for each other.
Randomize
