this kid just came up to me and asked me if i wanted to play truth or aids with him and his friends. i'm in
Went home with a 29 year old from the bar. Life lesson: 9 year olds stay up late sometimes
Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
we'll hang out once this whole, "your friends are robbers and drug addicts" thing blows over with my parents.
So dude, she and I just got done having the most amazing sex, and then she rolled over and said that "lets make some tacos" and proceeded to the kitchen... naked... I'm buying the ring tomorrow
Even the French judge on the olympics would give that a 10
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I just had a boat ride of shame. With Senior Citizens.
He was dressed in a pink dressing gown feeding people ketamine from a plastic sword he called Excalibur. how was your Monday?
When did it become appropriate to call your mother the morning after? While still naked in bed? WHEN?!
Chilling on my porch debating between pre work drinking or video games and getting high.
My liver needs the occasional pep talk and a reminder that we are two weeks into freshman year of college.
Should I have spent my entire pay check on Crown Royal and LSD? No. Do I regret it? Also, no.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
In your alcohol circus, can my act be juggling men? Let's be real, I can juggle multiple dick buddies better than a professional
I just made mac at 3:10 am... My life is falling apart...
Randomize
