Never forget that any girl can get her way if she puts her vagina on the table.
We just made mixed drinks in the bathroom of burger king. This is sad.
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
That place is a DUI and an STD waiting to happen. I think I'll pass.
Champagne pong turned into an expensive and painful experience.
Netflix, eggnog, and bed? Maybe some hand stuff?
Dude, you stalking his LINKEDIN profile will NOT affect your chances with him. We aren't 40...
Also food confession I ate an entire bag of starburst jelly beans today. and a plan B. All around think I hit all my nutrients
I did wake up to a random meat and cheese plate next to my bed, that was a thrill.
Should I tell him how he got the bruise on his ass or just enjoy his theories?
Omg i got really stoned and used a makeup app on my grandma...well, I’m definitely not adopted
they call themselves the foursome.. thats def means they're up for one right?
Randomize
