I may not go down in history, but i will definitely go down on your little sister.
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
I think I get why guys like boobs so much. I just motorboated myself and it's fun. My boobs feel soft and squishy on my face.
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
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I just went to pick up my pigeon from your house. You should be getting a picture soon
So, I was thinking... Since this restraining order doesn't go into affect until monday, that leaves us 5 days to wreck his world.
where are you?
talk to ya later, gotta sled down these stairs real quick
I just figured out how I'm going to tie you to my bed. Hint: I may have to go to the auto parts store before you get here.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I wonder if Paul and Andy realize how lucky that they are that we're too lazy to start fucking other dudes so we just stick with them
Definitely didn't just make out with a guy the same height as me just because we wanted to see what it would be like to not have to reach up....
the only fun thing to do here is drink beer and make mistakes. i feel like im in college again
I either have food poisoning or I'm pregnant. Either way, I NEED JESUS!
Despite evidence suggesting otherwise, it turns out max is 100%straight.
all my friends are getting married and here i am in a committed relationship with rum
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