2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
Dear everyone. As mark stated i did the 'piss n run' last night. This is all new to me and it scares me. Again, sorry. "if i could turn back time" -cher
Hey when you come over to pick me up in the mornin bring a camera. This is going to be legendary. Don't knock.... They might cover up
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
I just won Halloween Walk of Shame Bingo!
God Help those hot young girls. It's going to be like Bambi in iraq. Except worse.
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
We're stealing the mannequin. He's my new swimming partner.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I'm trying to convey to the smoking hot Spanish cleaning lady at work that I want to bone her but I think it's getting lost in translation. How do you say "blowjob" in Spanish?
Woke up the next morning in an 8 year old's bedroom. Saw my bra swinging from the spiderman ceiling fan and decided it would be best to dip out w/o it.
I feel like him using the excuse "I'm not a fan of lying" to stop me from sleeping around is hypocritical since he's cheating on his wife with me.
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
Randomize
